Movie: ZOMBIELAND

2009, Directed by Ruben Fleischer

"I HATE coconut. Not the flavor, but the consistency."

New Rule: Jesse Eisenberg can only make movies with titles that end in "-land". He's been in two of my favorite movies of 2009, Adventureland and now Zombieland. He's has a certain dry, nebbish-y, beleaguered nice kid persona that isn't forced or affected. (See Michael Cera for an example of "forced and affected"). He was perfect as "Columbus", the sensible sidekick to Woody Harrelson's slightly insane "Tallahassee", as they drive around the remains of the United States after the zombie plague has taken hold, teaming up with "Wichita" (Emma Stone) and "Little Rock" (Abigail Breslin) to smear the undead. As with DISTRICT 9 earlier this year, ZOMBIELAND jumps right into the story, with only the briefest of expository backstory - Patient Zero was infected after eating a hamburger laced with the zombie virus. From there, it's straight to the action, which is cartoonish and rollicking as opposed to gory and shocking. The gore is Evil Dead-style, gross but not terrifying. It probably earned it's "R" from the sheer amount of spent ammunition and Harrelson's unending stream of vulgarity, which at times reaches Natural Born Killers level. Overall, an immensely fun B-movie that moves along incredibly well, never gets maudlin, and also serves as a surprisingly instructive guide to surviving the zombie plague.

Just remember, always double tap. (And watch out for those bathrooms.)